My wife has a midlife-crisis

My wife and I are together since 10 years already. Until a few years ago we had a good relationship, very loving, warm and respectful. We were often still behaving like teenagers in love.

She also send out very different signals to me about me and our relationship. And she was hanging around with a friend a lot. First she said that she only felt friendship with him.

Then I checked her mobile and I found messages from them where they declare their love for each other. When I confronted her with this, she said she wanted to be with him.

Her and our surrounding didn't understand at all and couldn't believe it. To them we were happy with each other.

Then came a period where she was sometimes sorry, full of regret, loving to me and wanted to stay with me, and sometimes full of doubt, cold towards me, not seeing a future for us together. We also talked and cried a lot together.

It went up and down like this for a while. One moment completely in love and loving to me, and the next moment she said she didn't feel anything for me.

Now, she lives on her own, denies she has a midlife crisis and the contact with her surroundings is almost all gone. Her network, family, friends don't recognize her anymore. She changed from a loving woman into a self destructive woman.