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Family problems

Do you suffer from family problems?

 

For a lot of people it's helpful to write down and share their story. This open forum is a great place for:

 

  • Getting things off your chest.
  • Reading the stories of peers.
  • Connecting with peers and responding to stories.

 

Read the stories of other people with family problems and share your story.

 


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Story 1 - My family in law is much too present

My family in law is much too present

Good to read other people´s stories. That strengthens me. Looks like every family has some cross to bear. My personal cross is mainly my family in law. I just cannot get along with them.I think they are way too present. And actually I never want to see them. I mean, I never feel like seeing them.

My partner notices this. It´s actually painful for him. I wish I could feel more enthusiastic. but come one, when I explain the story to my friends, they all understand. Why does my partner not understand?


Anonymous

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Hello Anonymous

That is a tricky situation. Your partner grew up in that family and loves then. That does not automatically mean that you like them. I had the same problem. We solved this by going for a set time in the week, weather I want to or not (Saturday to his parents, Sunday to mine), and mainly by getting to understand what I do not like.

F.e. My family in law is very cuddly and loud, I am not, so we agreed on some boundaries for me and that works. I also deliberately looked for what I DO like (the closeness, always ready to help, honest...)

This is of course not a miracle trick, but it worked surprisingly well for me. Maybe it will help you too.

Greetings,


Daughter in law

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Story 2 - I have problems with my son in law

I have problems with my daughter and son in law. Actually mainly with my son in law and of course my daughter supports him. It went already to such a degree that I do not know if it will ever be ok again.

I already had a conversation with my daughter, but that nothing was achieved, because I am not allowed to say anything about him that bothers me. I have to talk to him about that, she says. And I would like to, but he doesn´t want that. I only get blames and that doesn´t solve anything.


Anonymous

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Dear Anonymous,
I am sorry to hear that you gave up the hope for a good outcome. It seems as though the conversations you had so far were

- ending in a fight
- were stopped by the other to prevent a fight

That seems to me like a difficult situation. I think I would stay bothered. Hopefully there will be a moment in time, where it is possible to have a good conversation.

I wish you the best of luck in this situation.


Me.

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Story 3 - One of our children fights a lot

We have a problem in our family. One of our children is fighting a lot, at school and also at home. it is difficult to make contact with him. He seems to close himself off more and more.


Anonymous

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Story 4 - I have a bad relationship with my father.

I have a bad relationship with my father and he blames me that I do not share enough with him, while he is also not doing that.

Now they think that it is because of his new girlfriend, although I have said many times now that this is not the problem.

This year it escalated, because he broke is promise and it was told to me by her. He thinks it is about the object, but for me it is about that he did not say anything before that he would come back to it.

I do not know what to do anymore. Now I have to go to a birthday visit soon and I do not know how to handle this.


Amanda

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Dear Amanda

I am sorry to read that you and your father do not have the relationship you wish for. Seems lonely to me. For him and for you.

I think it is difficult to get into contact again after an escalation. I hope you found a good solution.

I wish you all the best


M

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